Choose Connection Academy

Find Your Way to
Healing... Together.

A skills-based approach to relationship healing after rupture

Are you and your partner in search of a way to rebuild trust after betrayal, reignite your love and connection, and become a symbol of strength and resilience for your children (even adult children) during challenging times?

If so, this might just be the opportunity you’ve been searching for.

I’ve launched an all new, ALL ONLINE hybrid of digital education and live group coaching program for couples to experience my transformative Couple–Centered Recovery® model.

Many couples I encounter, just like yourselves, are grappling with a pivotal question: 'How do we mend our relationship after trust has been compromised?'

It's a crucial question, and the answer can fundamentally shift the trajectory of your relationship.

Too often, couples find themselves trapped in a cycle of persistent mistrust and emotional turbulence, placing additional strain on their relationship. Remember, this turmoil doesn't only impact the two of you – it echoes throughout your entire family.

I refer to this as the 'Trust & Healing Conundrum'. To effectively rebuild trust, there must be comprehensive healing for both partners.

Without this healing, it becomes challenging to progress.

Here's the Uplifting Part:

The resolution Might Be More Attainable Than You Think.

Grasping the nuances of betrayal’s aftermath, recognizing dysfunctional relationship patterns, and embracing effective healing strategies are crucial.

You indeed have the capacity to restore trust, rekindle affection, and relish in a harmonious, fulfilling relationship once more – with the right methodology and new skills.

I’m thrilled to guide a select group of committed couples, helping them evolve into the resilient, affectionate role models they aspire to be for their kids of all ages.

Together, we will explore strategies to rebuild trust, deepen your connection, and rejuvenate your relationship after the discovery of betrayal.

I'm offering a hybrid program of digital learning, homework and exclusive yet flexible coaching that meets you where you are, no matter what phase of recovery you're both in.

Here's What I'm Looking For:

Couples who have faced betrayal and are eager to restore trust and love.
A readiness to learn and apply a system for healing your bond.
The ability to commit time and effort over the upcoming months.
An eagerness for learning, readiness for transformation, and a deep commitment to your relationship.

If this speaks to you, don’t hesitate

and see if this new program is a good fit for you. Just reply to this email saying, "We're interested!" and we will send you the link to schedule.

Eagerly anticipating our potential collaboration,

Champion for Strong, Transformative Relationships

What are the objectives and results of Choose Connection Academy?

Objective One: Return to safety and stability so the deeper work can begin.

Create safety and stability for the relationship after the discovery of betrayal.

With the tools and personalized guidance provided in this program, together you can achieve these foundational key results:

Both members of the couple will have a basic understanding of their own and each other's experience of addiction and/or betrayal through the Couple-Centered Recovery® paradigm.
Both members of the couple will demonstrate skills for both self-regulation and co-regulation in the face of trauma triggers, cognitive distortions, and defense mechanisms.
The betrayed partner will establish and communicate boundaries that feel empowering. Boundaries that are a roadmap for how to access their deepest emotional intimacy.
The betraying partner will demonstrate a growing capacity for empathy and be confident in the face of the betrayed's pain.
Both members of the couple write shared goals for their recovery plan.
The couple has identified and begun a path toward a formal full disclosure process as an initial goal for recovery and healing. (This helps couples early after discovery, and is not a requirement of this program.)

- We do not actually facilitate your disclosure during this program. However we can refer you to our trusted partners who can facilitate this with you if you choose to.

- If you've already had disclosure, this level can still benefit each partner by increasing other vital recovery skills related to radical honesty, impact and restitution.

Objective Two: Face the grief of what's been lost and create a new shared story

Now that you have safety and stability as a couple, together you'll achieve these vital goals that continue to build safety, trust and empathy, as well as communication skills to navigate emotional conversations:

You'll both begin to understand the experience of betrayal discovery through the paradigm of grief work.
During this phase, you both will be guided through the process of creating and exchanging emotionally-focused impact and restitution letters.
You'll both be able to skillfully engage in healing grief conversations utilizing the REVAMPS process.
As a couple, you begin exploring the underlying dysfunctional dynamics that arise during the trauma and grief process, and work together to move toward a more empowered and healthy relational dynamic.

Objective 3: Revisioning the Relationship (Coming Soon)

The next natural phase of relationship recovery in the Couple-Centered Recovery® is the continued growth that springs from the transformational work you've done so far.

You'll create new goals, re-design your relationship with new shared understanding of safety, stability, and expanded capacities to meet life head on and manage it together putting the safety and priority of your relationship first.

(This Objective is currently in development. More information will be provided here as it becomes available.)

What's Included in This Program

The self-directed learning includes webinar-style videos that play a crucial role in your learning. The educational videos that will increase your knowledge and understanding of key relationship skills offer several benefits:

Flexibility and Accessibility

Class starts on your schedule. Videos can be accessed anytime, anywhere, at your convenience.

You choose your experience

You have control over the pace at which you progress through the material. There are no deadlines to meet because the group coaching is not dependent on any one module or topic.

Visual and Auditory Learning

Videos combine visual and auditory elements, catering to different learning styles. Visual learners can benefit from the slide presentations, and on-screen text, while auditory learners can absorb information through Dr. Porter's teaching using narration and dialogue.

Engagement and Interest

These well-produced videos will capture your attention and maintain your interest in the subject matter. Dr. Jake's teaching style using metaphor, storytelling, and multimedia elements can make learning more enjoyable and motivating for self-directed learners.

To ensure the quality and integrity of the group program, and to set each participant up for success, we ask that both of you participate in a brief Zoom interview with an Academy team member. Please find a time on our calendar that works for you both.

Although, watching videos in order to know and understand is helpful...

we invite you to go deeper and internalize that knowledge with worksheets and exercises.

Worksheets and exercises included:

Reinforcement of Concepts

Worksheets provide an opportunity for you to reinforce the concepts you learned in the video. By applying what you've learned to solve problems or answer questions, you can deepen your understanding of the material.

Active Engagement

Completing worksheets requires active engagement with the material. Instead of passively watching a video, learners are actively thinking, analyzing, and applying the information, which can enhance comprehension and retention.

Practice and Skill Development

Worksheets offer a chance for couples to practice the skills and techniques demonstrated in the video. Repetition through practice helps solidify learning and build mastery over these new concepts and skills.

Assessment of Understanding

Worksheets can serve as a form of assessment to gauge your understanding of the material covered in the video. By reviewing your answers, you can identify areas where you may need further review or clarification.

Independent Learning

Completing worksheets independently fosters self-directed learning skills. It encourages learners to take ownership of their learning process, work at their own pace, and develop problem-solving abilities.

Overall, integrating worksheets with video content can enhance the learning experience by promoting active engagement, reinforcing concepts, and providing opportunities for practice and assessment.

These concepts are ground-breaking, and learning new skills takes time, effort and practice. Sometimes we get stuck or need additional personalized guidance. We're here to meet you where you are with personalized coaching.

We provide a variety of ways to get personal guidance on using the Couple-Centered Recovery Model.

Weekly Group Coaching Zoom Meetings with Dr. Jake: We offer you weekly group coaching zoom meeting calls, designed to meet you where you are in your learning. Because the coaching calls are not focused on any particular module or topic, you can ask questions and get coaching guidance on what your questions are that week, what you're stuck on or what you're struggling with this week. The coaching calls are interactive, not lecture. Speak up at any time and share or ask a question. Or, leave your camera off and just listen in. Your choice.
"Hot Seat" Coaching: We routinely ask for volunteer couples to be on the "Hot Seat" for coaching, during the group coaching call. The volunteer Couple is given up to 3 minutes to describe what skills they're struggling with, or what problem they're grappling with that week. Dr. Jake provides feedback and coaching for that couple through practicing these new Couple-Centered skills.
Private one on one asynchronous video/audio coaching: Record up to 3 minutes of private audio or video, as an individual or couple, and upload to our private confidential files area. Dr. Jake will review your recording and provide personalized, confidential video or audio feedback coaching within 2 business days.
Community Coaching: Join our HIPAA compliant, moderated community of couples in this program, where all Academy members can share wins, ask questions and get feedback from other couples on the same journey as you. Our community will be monitored by coaches certified in the Couple-Centered Recovery® model, the Director of Couples Care and at times, Dr. Jake.

Questions We Get:

Who is this for?

From Dr. Jake:

"I only work with couples who desire to see their relationship healed, when the betraying partner is committed to radical honesty and growth, when the betrayed partner is willing to face the unfair reality of her own need for healing, and when both are willing to do what's necessary to repair the marriage."

We're looking for couples who can work collaboratively together to consume the content and do homework tasks together, to practice the new skills together.

We're looking for people who are fully committed to put themselves into this work for the good of their relationship.

Who is this not for?

I absolutely reject clients who are not willing to fully disclose their secrets and take responsibility for their actions, who blame others for their decisions, and aren't willing to change their behaviors.

Is this therapy?

Participants are expected to follow the guidance of their medical and mental health providers as they engage this program.

Participation in Choose Connection Academy is an educational skills building and coaching program; it is NOT an offer of psychotherapy or professional mental health counseling, nor does it replace legal, financial, or medical advice.

Do we have to do personal therapy first?

The Couple-Centered Recovery model addresses the relationship needs from day one of discovery. The couple doesn't have to have a period of "personal work" first in order to benefit from learning these new skills and methods.

Does this replace other types of marriage therapy or counseling?

We believe that you are the best people to make that determination. If you're enjoying working with someone and don't want to stop, it won't interfere with the skills you're learning in the Choose Connection Academy. You decide.

Participants are expected to follow the guidance of their medical and mental health providers as they engage this program.

We haven't had a formal disclosure - can we join?

It's not necessary for the couple to have completed a Full Therapeutic Disclosure before joining the Academy.

Do we do a disclosure in this program?

We provide education on the Full Therapeutic Disclosure process in this program, however we don't facilitate the process for the couple as part of this program.

We can refer you to one of our trusted providers to help you through the process of completing it.

How do we know what Level is best for us?

We can help you identify which level is best for you to enter the program. Please schedule an Exploratory Meeting with our Director of Couples Care so we can determine the best fit for success for your relationship.

Is this guarenteed to help my marriage?

Our participants must recognizes that Choose Connection Academy is not a magical fix, and that their complete dedication to the process, as well as that of their partner, will determine their success in this program.

It is important to IACCR that program participants feel they have made a good investment in this program. We do offer a Money-Back Guarantee with some limitations and conditions. To learn more about the policy, please schedule an interview with the Director of Couples Care.

When are the group coaching calls?

The weekly coaching calls are purposely staggered on different days (Monday through Friday) at different times of the day, to meet the different needs of partipcants with different schedules and different time zones.

All meetings are recorded in case you can't make them live.

When you enroll, you get immediate access to the calendar of dates and times and the Zoom link, and past meeting recordings.

Can we join at any time?

Yes, this is rolling enrollment. You can join at any time.

Because the learning content is presented as self-directed, and people may progress at their own pace. The group coaching calls are not focused on any specific content. The group coaching calls are specifically to allow coaching on the questions couples may have pertaining to what's going on for them that week. There's no need to hurry through the content.

Can I protect my identity in this program.

There is no need to reveal your identity to other members in this program. We use Zoom for group coaching, but there's no requirement to turn on your camera. You can listen in without using your camera or microphone.

What participants are saying:

"I get so much out of these sessions. We come out of them feeling hopeful and I feel excited to try the things I've learned."

"I do want to share with you that each time we watch a video or listen to Dr Porter, I realize how much I might just learn here and how much will be solidified for my earlier learning."

"I feel more confident knowing that I have a lot of other people who support/agree with me and I’m starting to find my voice to stop being 'victimized'"

"Thank you so much - I feel things shifting and changing for me - not all clarity and rainbows, but things are happening...and it seems new."

Interested in Joining?

Book an Exploratory Call to See if Choose Connection Academy is Right for You

To ensure the quality and integrity of the group program, and that each participant is poised for success,

we require that you both participate in a short Zoom interview with our Director of Couples Care. Find a time on our calendar that works for you both: